Well Doc, will I ever be young again?

DEFINITION: v. intr. To spend years and years wishing you could be young again, only to discover that it's actually happening, but not exactly as you imagined.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Rejuvenackered: /ree jew ven ack erred/ when he had wished for the body of a much younger man, he had hoped he'd be able to control his dribbling a little better. He was rejuvenackered, he shouldn't have gone to the nightclub in the first place and it was going to take him the best part of what remained of the night to get these damn leather trousers off. Etymology: rejuvenation, knackered. Created by: galwaywegian.

Geriatricks: /jerry-a-triks/ Geriatricks is a miserable joke played on people in the prime of life Etymology: geriatrics + tricks Created by: porsche.

Deagerate: /dee-age-er-ate/ The disease caused his body to deagerate at a rate much quicker than his family had anticipated. Etymology: degenerate + age Created by: Stevenson0.

Poncedelirious: /pons-du-leer-ee-us/ He had hoped the magic potion would make him feel 25 again, but instead he found himself poncedelirious and drooling within an hour. Etymology: PONCE (from Ponce de Leon - the explorer looking for the fountain of youth) + DELIRIOUS (mental state characterized by confusion and agitation) Created by: serendipity9000.

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Why are you licking your pizza?

DEFINITION: v. tr. To eat in a peculiar or ritualistic manner in an effort to lose weight while consuming more. n. An idiosyncratic method of eating, usually adopted for "health reasons".

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Celeremony: /SEL-uh-ree-moh-nee/ Elena reverently placed the perfectly trimmed stalks into place - a perfect pentagram (5 grams), in preparation for her nightly celeremony. Etymology: celery, ceremony Created by: Alchemist.

Safepecks: /safe-pex/ After failing on both the Fatkins Diet and SlimFat, Louise tried practicing Safepecks, slowly nibbling on small bits of food. Unfortunately, for her, it only meant that it took her two hours to finish off the entire pizza. Etymology: safe sex, peck Created by: purpleartichokes.

Liet: /lie-et/ she only ate fruit flavoured ice cream because she was on a very strict liet Etymology: lie, diet Created by: rikboyee.

Vegebation: /veg-uh-bey-shun/ Vegebation is the peculiar ritual Tiffany practises. She only drinks her food. She juicers all her vegetables and tofu together and drinks her meals to prevent wear and tear on her teeth and reduce facial aging lines from chewing. Vegebation is also part of the 'X-Man' cultasy which proclaims that this activity will reduce the side effects of youthanesia. Etymology: vegetarian + libation; vegebation -n. An idiosyncratic method of eating, usually adopted for "health reasons". Created by: Stevenson0.

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Going where no man has gone before.

DEFINITION: n. A pop culture entertainment property, which has transcended itself and become a de facto religion with legions of devotees, prescribed rituals and sacred texts.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Predalektion: /pree-dalek-shun/ The predalektion is a cult made up of crazed Dr Who fans who gather once a week in parking lots and bump into each other while saying over and over in stacatto voices "Exterminate" "Exterminate" Etymology: predilection (inclination) + dalek (of Dr. Who fame) Created by: Jabberwocky.

Borganization: /bor-gan-iz-a-shun/ It wasn't long before the Star Trek series went from a simple buycon, content with selling action figures of Spock and Kirk, to a borganization, with a huge cult-like following of devotees. Etymology: borg, organization Created by: purpleartichokes.

Phenomination: /fi-nom-uh-NEY-shuhn/ Fans of science fiction may be divided into countless phenominations. Of these, Trekkies may be divided into several hundred thousand subphenominations. Thus concludes my example paragraph. Etymology: phenomenon + denomination Created by: Clayton.

Fanaticult: /fah-nah-tee-cult/ The Spockonian Fanaticult was the new religion rivaling Christianity in 101 G.T. [Geek Times]. Etymology: fan + fanaticism + cult Created by: ohwtepph.

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It’s about my husband’s new prescription

DEFINITION: n. An unintended consequence of medical or psychological therapy, especially if the therapy is supposed to make you feel "young again".

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Teenmentia: /teen-men-chah/ After a trip to the stud farmacologist and eating two boxes of Wild Oats 'n' Bran, Bob got a wicked case of Teenmentia. His neighbors watched in horror as he chased his poor old wife Alice around the yard while simulataneously crooning the Barry White tune "Let's Get It On." Etymology: teen, dementia Created by: purpleartichokes.

Youthanasia: /yoo-thuh-ney-zee-ast/ Viagra and some other new miracle drugs are a form of youthanasia. With these drugs, young ideas, images and urgings are brought about in an old, incapable body. Etymology: youth + euthanasia Created by: Stevenson0.

Cocoonsequence: /cah-coon-see-kwens/ sure, i had extra vitality, but the appearance of 15 superfluous nipples was an upsetting cocoonsequence Etymology: consequence, cocoon[the movie...with steve guttenberg] Created by: rikboyee.

Slideeffect: /slide-eefekt/ The slideefect to the new medication made Bob wear baggy pants that hung low on his hips and let his underwear show. It gave a whole new meaning to slip slidin away Etymology: slide + side effect Created by: Jabberwocky.

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The gossip around here is worse than high school

DEFINITION: v. tr. To complain and complain about a problem without ever taking action to correct it. n. A complaint about something which you can fix but choose not to.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Grouchpotato: /grouch-po-ta-toe/ David was a grouchpotato. He constantly complained but took no action and wound up with "secretary spread" on his hips. Etymology: couch potato/grouch Created by: toadstool57.

Whinertia: /wine-ER-sha/ Having perfected the fine art of complaining about everything and solving nothing, she could have run for Governor of the state of whinertia -- and won in a landslide. Etymology: whine (and/or whiner) + inertia Created by: Katisms1.

Longwhineded: /long-wine-did/ The head trader was so longwhineded that the constant cacophony he created garnered him the distinction of being known as a whine expert. Etymology: long winded (constant) + whine Created by: Jabberwocky.

Deridleness: /di-RAHYD-l-nis/ Gracie's incessant deridling was symptomatic of her untenable hypocrisycophancy. She was even heard complaining to the boss about the tissues in her own wastebaskPublish Postet. Etymology: deride + idleness Created by: Clayton.

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Jennifer? You've changed your hairstyle! I like it!

DEFINITION: v. tr. To seek approval from your boss by emulating their style, mannerisms or affectations. n. A person who uses such techniques to win favor.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Ingratiape: /in-gray-si-aip/ Ms. York was able to photocopy her fundament on "letter" at the office party, while Susan had to switch to "legal", undermining her ongoing efforts to ingratiape herself with her supervisor. Etymology: ingratiate + ape (copy) Created by: administraitor.

Doppelmanager: /dah-puhl-man-a-jer/ All butt-kissing and other adminitraits aside, when Bob showed up sporting the same Rocky and Bullwinkle tie that the boss wore, it was readily apparent that he had become a doppelmanager destined for the Borg room. Simpresarios always wound up as directums. Etymology: doppelganger, manager Created by: purpleartichokes.

Suckcessor: /successor/ Tina is now a consultant on suckcession planning. She has a wealth of experience in career advancement through the judicious use plastic surgery and the less intrusive techniques of mimicry and style adoption. Etymology: suck up to + successor Created by: petaj.

Panderox: /pan-der-ox/ With a vice-president position available, individuals being considered for the position panderox the boss at every possible opportunity. The secretaries have a chart keeping track of who is the biggest panderoxing fool. Etymology: pander + xerox Created by: Stevenson0.

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Why do you always carry that file folder?

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. tr. To use such a prop to mask inactivity.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Slackcessory: /slak-sess-or-ee/ Phil's slackcessory wasn't fooling anyone. The "tech manual" he was toting around was the instruction booklet for his lawn mower. Apparently, he was Fridazed when he took that course on shirkonomics. Etymology: slack (to avoid work), accessory Created by: purpleartichokes.

Industricators: /in-DUST-ri-caters/ Memo To: WOT Team..... From: WOT Team Leader %%%%%%%%%%%% Hi Team, The big boss is coming to visit on Friday. Please make sure that you have a good selection of industricators and suggestoilibles on hand to ensure that she leaves with 'right' impression. We don't want her to think that WOT stands for Waste of Time. ta, oh and please eat this memo before Friday. Etymology: industry + indicator + extricate (could get the lazy staffer an allayoffment, and out of a sticky situation) Created by: petaj.

Evidiligence: /-ˌɛvəˈdɪlədʒɛns-/ While folders and papers make excellent passive evidiligence for someone on the move, a mobile phone or PDA can serve the same purpose even when seated at one's desk, though such tools require an active effort to complete the effect of slackofflage. Etymology: From evidence + diligence Created by: ErWenn.

Phantofiles: /fan-tuh-files/ John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise. Etymology: phantom + files Created by: Stevenson0.

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